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“quickie” thoughts on sexuality

*pun intended* ;)

Sexuality in singleness and how this plays out in the premarriage relationship is a very interesting topic to me of late but I’m not going to attempt to discuss it here until I have a firmer grasp on my thoughts. But I did want to direct you to 2 posts that quickly touch on this issue.

One is my husband’s over at his blog, another is something I just wrote over at christian feminism blog. David has posted some really interesting thoughts about the whole “man as head because God is head” argument in particular.

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12 Comments

  1. Tia Lynn — January 27, 2008 #

    Wow. I’ve been to some conservative-evangelical churches, but I’ve never heard something so stupid as men are the only ones who really want sex, and women just use it to keep men in the relationship. It boggles some people’s minds that women might actually enjoy sex just as much as men, and Christian women at that! That kind of thinking, I believe, stems from the mindset that sex, even in marriage, is something “dirty” and shameful, and ultimately a man’s domain.

  2. Mak — January 27, 2008 #

    I know. Here’s the thing too, I know these guys and I’m sure they would say that that isn’t what they’re saying…but the reality of the belief system comes through when they’re not paying attention you know?

  3. Tia Lynn — January 27, 2008 #

    Yup it’s funny how certain mindsets and worldviews can become so deeply ingrained in us that we cannot even recognize that they are at the root of so many of our other beliefs. I’m sure I do this too.

  4. smerdykov — January 28, 2008 #

    I am just curious if anyone here has read any Theology of the Body or works about it?

  5. Mak — January 28, 2008 #

    it’s the Pope’s work on gender and sexuality and stuff - - beyond that I don’t know much more.

  6. smerdykov — January 28, 2008 #

    I have not read the actual “Theology of the Body”compilation, but I have read a couple of summaries by Christopher West and a study guide called “Men and Women are from Eden”. It definitely talks about the two sexes and how our sex and the complimentariesness of the opposite sex can help us to understand better our relationship to God.

    I was just curious if anyone else had read anything on it so I could bounce some ideas around.

    Thanks.

  7. smerdykov — January 28, 2008 #

    ( posting comment here per your request )

    I am not sure what you mean in terms of “egalitarian” exactly, but based on your use of “caveat” I doubt it would match up in this example.

    “Theology of the Body” (TOB) would state that Man (humanity) is created by God to be equal in dignity ( no matter the sex ) but distinct or distiguished in nature or function. That is distiguishable both in our personhood and individuality, but more easily obvious in just our body make up. These physical distictions help us to understand ourselves, others, and our relationship to God.

    I am not sure if that makes sense or if I am giving the work a proper interpretation.

    Would that agree with your use of the term egalitarian?

  8. Mak — January 28, 2008 #

    yes that makes sense. Egalitarianism as a label is pretty broad but the general idea is that we are equal. Sameness is not inherent in the definition. Egalitarian actually is used to apply to more than just gender as well. I’m egalitarian in regard to race as well. We are equal but we are not the same. So I’m not sure what the ramifications are when that explanation is applied so I can’t say for sure if I agree with it specifically but yes, equal and individual, equal and different.

    Where I imagine I would stray from TOB is the practical applications - whether or not women can be ordained for example.

  9. smerdykov — January 29, 2008 #

    Ok. So we are equal in dignity. Which is inherent in being a human being.

    Would you agree that the physical distinctions in body, specifically the sexual organs, would give a different definition of what the different sexes vocation are?

    i.e. Motherhood or Fatherhood.

    Outside of the broader idea of ordination as was stated above.

  10. Mak — January 29, 2008 #

    it’s always hard to talk about these things with strangers because we all speak from a certain subtext through a certain lens.

    I’m not sure I would consider “motherhood” or “fatherhood” a vocation. I also don’t like distinguishing identity issues according to sex organs.

  11. smerdykov — January 29, 2008 #

    I understand the oddity of jumping from the theoretical to the physical can be a bit of a jump. Not to mention the oddity of someone whom you do not know making such an abrupt jump. Unfortunately for some, I am speaking with the language of TOB and attempting to look at the world through that lens.

    So I hope I did not offend or disturb you.

    Either way, I can continue asking questions or attempting to figure out where you are coming from, but understand that it can be a greater jump from comment boxes to actual conversation. If you would like to continue talking about this topic or for that matter start a conversation feel free to e-mail me or if you desire I can continue in the comment box.

    Thanks for your responses and for you time.

    Have a Blessed day.

  12. Mak — January 29, 2008 #

    no offense at all. I was just making the point that when one person says “physical distinctions determining vocation” it can mean something very different in his/her mind than when said by another.

    this issue sounds fascinating but I don’t have the language necessary for the discussion since I haven’t read TOB. Perhaps I can read up on it a bit and then post something at which time I’d love to have your input. :)

    you are of course welcome to email me or continue commenting here to see if others might have something to contribute.

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